Ode to Beeker

Okay, this is a two-part crack-up. Let me preface crack-up number two with crack-up number one, Beeker (the Muppet) performing "Ode to Joy:"



I've seen this umpteen times and still laugh out loud at all the subtle details; the way he sets up each camera like in a real home movie, the way he's increasingly alarmed by the timpani playing...hysterical!

So, part two is (dum, da-dum, dum) a teacher story...I'm sorry! I know how annoying it can be to listen to people go on about their students, especially if you're not a teacher, but since this is kind of a piggyback on part one, I'll allow myself a teacher tale.

So I used this today in my four-year-old classes. We have been studying "high" and "low," and today's lesson was about direction of pitch. And since the melodic line to "Ode to Joy" is pretty simple and very linear, it's an easy tune for the kids to follow the direction of the melody. Therefore, part of today's lesson included us singing with Beeker (after having already watched it once to get the giggles out) and using our hands to show the direction of the melody.

A good sign that the kids liked the lesson is that when their classroom teacher comes to pick them up, they chatter to her about all the cool things they did in music. And usually they all talk at once, so you only hear bits and pieces of what they're talking about. Today however, it was very clear what their favorite music activity was, because all the way up the stairs the entire class serenaded their teacher (in miscellaneous keys) "mee, mee, mee, mee, mee, mee....."

Their teacher, I'm sure, had no clue...

Monkey HEAR, monkey do

When we moved here, I expected that everyone around me would be speaking with some sort of southern drawl and I'd be the odd ball. I thought that people would make remarks about my speech the same way I'd comment on someone's southern drawl in Illinois ("Oh, so where are you from? You don't sound like you're from around here...").

To my surprise, quite a few people speak "normally," that is, without the drawl, as this area seems to have attracted a lot of transplants from places like Florida, Ohio, New England (there's a dialect of a different color) and various other states east of Illinois. In fact, of everyone working in Josh's office, there's only one person who did NOT come from out of state. So, I have become pretty comfortable with the idea that my mid-western dialect has not stuck out too badly, as the locals here are pretty used to hearing a variety.

I was humbled today, however, in one of my Kindergarten classes. (Yes, it's a teacher story, but stick with me...) Today we played a new game which required the use of a large mat. I rolled out the mat, explained the rules, and then had the children find their places on the mat. In directing them to find their places, I told them to "go all the way around the mat." And I stressed "around," just a little, using my finger to follow the direction in which I wanted them to walk. I'm sure I was being animated, but I swear I wasn't trying to be funny. But as soon as I said "arouuunnnd," I had about three kids in unison mimic me:

"araaaaaaaaaound!" Like, all nasally and mid-western.

Thanks, guys.

I know they weren't making fun of me, because the only time they do that is when they think I'm being purposely silly. And apparently I naturally sound silly to them. So there ya' go. And I was worried that South Carolina would change the way I talk...

Bathroom Humor

I saw this bumper sticker on a truck the other day and about died. Since I was driving, I couldn't get a picture (I couldn't get close enough. Oh yeah...and that's just not safe...) so I googled the bumper sticker. The picture was copyrighted, so I cheated a little to get it, but if you want this bumper sticker, go to www.zazzle.com. (There. A free plug should get me out of trouble.)

False Advertizing

My favorite style of shirt, and the one I own the most of, is the simple collared, button-down-the front shirt, tapered at the waistline. It has always been the most flattering for my body type. And when I lost weight a couple of years ago, I decided that my money would be better invested in new pants and I could make the shirts last, as big pants could potentially fall off, and big shirts would just be roomy.

Well, two years later, I finally decided that my tried and true shirts were beginning to look sloppy, and have been looking for some sale items to replace the relics in my closet. Lo and behold, about two months ago, I did find a beautiful purple pin-striped shirt in the style as described above for only ten dollars! Here was the problem...after I lost the weight I had made my way into wearing a size small in most cases. Elated by that, I stubbornly refused to buy anything but, no matter how it really fit. And at the time I bought the shirt, I had just moved to Greenville after three months without living with my husband and having just been through the stress of the move. I had gained ten pounds. But I still bought the small, dammit. And didn't wear it for two months because it felt tight. (Duh.)

In the last few weeks I have slowly shed some of the weight I had re-gained, and felt brave enough to try the shirt. It looked great! It felt great! I put on a flattering pare of khaki's to match and pranced off to work, feeling fabulous, showing off my re-acquired waistline to anyone who might notice.

It wasn't until I got home and looked in the mirror that I realized what people may have been staring at. You know how sometimes you miss those little stickers that come attached to your clothing? Yup, I had one of those. Unfortunately it was a size sticker: the letter "S" was affixed to the dead center of my left breast.

Of course.

Yes, it's nice when people notice that my features are smaller, but I certainly don't need a label for people to see that I'm not well endowed.

How do you take YOUR coffee?

A couple of weeks ago when was assigned to work at the Carolina First branch in Greer, I passed a new little retail building on the way to the bank. There were only two spaces in the building. On one side, a Dunkin' Donuts had found a home. On the other side, a liquor store had set up camp. What's so funny is that the liquor store doesn't even have a name of it's own yet, just a little sign in the window to let people know what's goin' on. So with Dunkin' Donuts as the only logo on the building, it looks like they're selling a little bit more than coffee with their pastries!


I like to call it... (wait for it...)



DRUNKIN' DONUTS!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!

(I know, that's aweful.)

WTF?

We were at a party tonight with our church friends and a conversation started about specialty license plates and what it takes to get one in SC. Here, if you don't order a specialty plate, they otherwise are printed as part of a series. For example, my plate came in the "A" series (see the ADD blog). Each series ID consists of three letters and three numbers. Apparently North Carolina prints their non-specialty plates the same way. However, North Carolina ran into a little problem with their series numbers...check out this article:

North Carolina DMV To Replace WTF License Plates For Free

On the Internet people know what WTF stands for but it takes local DMVs a little longer to catch on. Now that they have caught on the North Carolina DMV is offering to change license plates for free.

Officials learned last year the common acronym stands for a vulgar phrase in e-mail and cell phone text messages.

The DMV recently realized the same letters appeared on the sample license plate on its own Web site. Officials are trying to remove the plate from the site.

DMV officials got word of the plates last July when a 60-year-old technology teacher from Fayetteville complained about the plate after her teenage grandchildren clued her in.

DMV officials said they try to keep up with the latest acronyms, and that anyone who has an issue with their plate can contact their local DMV office to request a new one.

There are about 10,000 North Carolina drivers with WTF plates according to the WXII12.com news story. This WTF license plate "problem" appears to be countrywide.

Posted on June 26, 2008 on http://www.driversdrive.com/cgi-bin/ddblog.pl?ddblog=626081

(P.S. For those of you who aren't quite up to date on your text-messaging lingo (Mom), WTF stands for "What the F***?" and if you're not quite sure what the "F***" stands for, gimme a call. )